shadesdude
2009-02-24, 18:02
While a scan was happening I got bored and wrote this.
Ode to Spybot Search and Destroy
This story begins like all the rest,
With a helpless damsel in distress,
And a monster in a cave afar
With teeth as big as a meg if not more.
So my tale begins in the town of Har-Drive,
a peaceful place where bits were happy and pixels flied,
with nary a care in the world until that day,
that the evil Virtumonde robbed it away.
He disabled the security center and changed the town registry,
having done that and still not happy,
he changed the sky from e-mail and stuffs,
to advertisements on enlarging your junk.
This was the last straw the princess needed help,
but who to turn to? They had to be smart,
and cunning and handsome, as strong as an ox,
and just like that she knew where to start.
Shades was the person who would fix all her problems
oh so smart, and handsome to!
with the cunning of a fox and the strength of an ox
and hair that glowed gold and four eyes too!
So Shades set to work without any help,
he walked to the town and was met with a shock,
the gatekeeper would let none pass,
he simply kept yelling "PASSWORD FOR ADMINISTRATOR"
Now a thought occurred and with great haste,
he attached a note to a bird and set it away,
upon its return were the words of power which spoke aloud,
"A ... D... M... I... N..." let a ring from the tower. (Daaa da dah dunnnnn)
The gate was lifted and the hero passed through,
with no second thought of what the evil Virtumonde might do,
carelessly he walked into the fray,
and around from the corner death came his way.
A Trojan, a virus, and a worm of great size
all bared down on our hero, spelling his demise
but in a moment of panic or maybe great cunning
Shades pressed the power button until Har-Drive stopped running
Now knowing that the power of Admin rights were no match for Virtumonde and his evil plan,
Shades set out to get help from a friend,
a man named Bart with powers so great,
that he could gain entry to Har-Drive without passing the gate.
Preparations were made and a stick was prepared,
a stick of great power but not of great size,
plugged and mounted and ready to ride,
however on boot, "Disk Error, Press any key to restart"
The alchemy continued for a few more hours,
until the stick had the magical powers,
and upon entry to the outskirts of Har-Drive a miraculous thing happened,
the hero was now inside.
Free to explore with his cloak of shadows,
he freed the hive of the evil inside,
removed the bits that were no longer alive,
striped the power of Virtumonde aside.
But this in not the end for you see,
upon returning, Har-Drive was no more,
it was simply a cave of spyware, adware,
and some left over files dead on the floor.
But not one to surrender Shades pushed on
deeper into the cave, and as light grew scarce,
he saw Virtumonde staring straight forth
and knew what must be done to settle this score.
The dead files were renamed to remove Virtumonde's power,
and the startup entries were scoured,
the old explorer’s hooks were removed from the walls,
and Virtumonde shrank as his kingdom fell.
With one last attempt Virtumonde tried to take hold,
grasping for browsers, files, whatever he could.
"Deny Change, Deny Change, Deny Change" our hero yelled
and Virtumonde was no more, gone was his hold.
And now the bits are happy and the pixels fly,
Through the clouds above green hills, but left to remind
of Virtumonde's power is a mountain with a cave just over the hill
that comes preinstalled with windows XP.
Ode to Spybot Search and Destroy
This story begins like all the rest,
With a helpless damsel in distress,
And a monster in a cave afar
With teeth as big as a meg if not more.
So my tale begins in the town of Har-Drive,
a peaceful place where bits were happy and pixels flied,
with nary a care in the world until that day,
that the evil Virtumonde robbed it away.
He disabled the security center and changed the town registry,
having done that and still not happy,
he changed the sky from e-mail and stuffs,
to advertisements on enlarging your junk.
This was the last straw the princess needed help,
but who to turn to? They had to be smart,
and cunning and handsome, as strong as an ox,
and just like that she knew where to start.
Shades was the person who would fix all her problems
oh so smart, and handsome to!
with the cunning of a fox and the strength of an ox
and hair that glowed gold and four eyes too!
So Shades set to work without any help,
he walked to the town and was met with a shock,
the gatekeeper would let none pass,
he simply kept yelling "PASSWORD FOR ADMINISTRATOR"
Now a thought occurred and with great haste,
he attached a note to a bird and set it away,
upon its return were the words of power which spoke aloud,
"A ... D... M... I... N..." let a ring from the tower. (Daaa da dah dunnnnn)
The gate was lifted and the hero passed through,
with no second thought of what the evil Virtumonde might do,
carelessly he walked into the fray,
and around from the corner death came his way.
A Trojan, a virus, and a worm of great size
all bared down on our hero, spelling his demise
but in a moment of panic or maybe great cunning
Shades pressed the power button until Har-Drive stopped running
Now knowing that the power of Admin rights were no match for Virtumonde and his evil plan,
Shades set out to get help from a friend,
a man named Bart with powers so great,
that he could gain entry to Har-Drive without passing the gate.
Preparations were made and a stick was prepared,
a stick of great power but not of great size,
plugged and mounted and ready to ride,
however on boot, "Disk Error, Press any key to restart"
The alchemy continued for a few more hours,
until the stick had the magical powers,
and upon entry to the outskirts of Har-Drive a miraculous thing happened,
the hero was now inside.
Free to explore with his cloak of shadows,
he freed the hive of the evil inside,
removed the bits that were no longer alive,
striped the power of Virtumonde aside.
But this in not the end for you see,
upon returning, Har-Drive was no more,
it was simply a cave of spyware, adware,
and some left over files dead on the floor.
But not one to surrender Shades pushed on
deeper into the cave, and as light grew scarce,
he saw Virtumonde staring straight forth
and knew what must be done to settle this score.
The dead files were renamed to remove Virtumonde's power,
and the startup entries were scoured,
the old explorer’s hooks were removed from the walls,
and Virtumonde shrank as his kingdom fell.
With one last attempt Virtumonde tried to take hold,
grasping for browsers, files, whatever he could.
"Deny Change, Deny Change, Deny Change" our hero yelled
and Virtumonde was no more, gone was his hold.
And now the bits are happy and the pixels fly,
Through the clouds above green hills, but left to remind
of Virtumonde's power is a mountain with a cave just over the hill
that comes preinstalled with windows XP.