so he quickly grabbed his
One day Mortimer was thinking that he needs a break and the sun is shining, so he decides to do his favorite thing; eat grass; hopefully he don't become green. But he did and became ill that he has to ask the Martians for help, they said see the Venetians. But they just threw pie that was so sweet that it was inedible, so the Venetians looked at him, hosted him and all teleport in their vassal, including Mortimer, saying they have a cure for him.. and holy shit that is eating turnips smothered in ketchup!! So he decides to do the cure, but it doesn't work so he became green.So, the Venetians say,'Oops,but that was our aim,we thought you'd prefer being half a human half a Martian, because we saw a hero in you that can save the universe from the green, green grass of grasstopia,the most evil,grassy green planet where only live grass monsters and giant termites. Mortimer becomes frightened so he runs and hides behind the green UFO hoping that nobody will find him, and then he could go home thinking of ways to become ungreen or realize that he's dreaming. So, he began to look around if somebody sees him and began sneaking up to the tree on the right. Glancing around furtively, he began to climb up the green tree. Suddenly, the tree began growing, suddenly shaking and fruits began forming in the shape of a pink heart, falling down towards Mortimer. Suddenly, they transformed into little aliens that came down, and landed in Mortimer's face and his skin turned pink, with green polka, and gets back to normal after the aliens change him. So he is really glad to be back to his own boring life where he eats grass,and crunches numbers,when all of sudden the venetians came back and...transformed Mortimer into a ghost...where he had the chance to visit Patrick Swayze on the set of Ghost, and give him a few pointers about the other side. Grateful, Patrick taught him the Merengue.
So he could hopefully impress the other ghosts, but unfortunately Mortimer did not learn the mambo because every move looked the same and people rub their bodies with goose fat for the sole purpose of attracting the opposite sex. It had the desired effect, Mortimer met a beautiful young woman who's eyes shone like diamonds.They called her "Star" because her eyes twinkled as she spoke, she also had, on her left leg, a large tattoo a picture and words which were a stark reminder of times when she was lost,the picture was of the sacred tree from the place of her birth, the words were an ancient poem from Balooga Firizi, the land of her dreams, but she was ignoring Mortimer. He looked for a way to impress her, so he decided to quote the poem, and to his surprise she kissed him so intensely that his false teeth were dislodged. Sadly, they fell on her toes,develop an own life and started biting Star's toes! Mortimer was mortified. He reached down to grab the snapping gnashers, but Star, in a sudden reflex act, drew up her knee and pushed it against Mortimer's chest stopping him and in a soft,bewitching voice said ‘Please save me from the Martians, they want to take away my knowledge of the Merengue. But I am Terpsichore and I cannot relinquish any of my dancing unless it can be replaced by poetry, will you help me find a word that rhymes with Merengue'? I don't need to I know, but I think it is... dang!! Silly me, almost all Martian words rhyme with Merengue, but please, can I get a cookie? I have a chocolate disease, so I don't want to vomit goo again. But Mortimer denied her a cookie, and she got totally powerless, that the whole planet become grassy. The grass burned down totally, and the only thing left..... is a piece of swiss cheese.
Then all of a sudden the cheese moved...
only the holes wanted to stay! So he quickly grabbed his